Johnny Law

WTF do I even say about Baker ???? 63" in 3 days like the ticket says. I skedaddled out of Bellingham hot to hit the Mt Baker hiway. The road while well designed with consistent low grade is at least 12 miles of seemingly constant switchbacks and was one of the more sporting drives I've undertaken while being in control. To anyone that goes, respect that road, it is no joke. I'm not a religious person but if there are those spiritual places in skiing, Jackson, Alta, Aspen, Cham, etc etc then I contend you must add Baker to the list. First of all the views are unbelievably spectacular, Shuksan alone would be unbelievable but the arm, the globular sort of hemispheres, Baker itself etc etc etc. I can't say enough about how good the place is to simply stand and look around in any of 360 degrees. At the top of chair 8 you go up and out the arm so the top of the chair looks across at the entire arm like a stadium. Some group was filming, dropping absolute bombs and you can just stand there at the top of the lift and take the whole thing in. I do it no justice either in pics or prose but it is stunning. This is the spot at the top of 8 First legit run I'm going to chair 8 and the guy next to me is trying to recruit me to go out the arm although he has zero gear and like isotoners on lol lol We settle for what he kept calling the elbow, it was maybe 15 mins of quick but mostly flat sort of skating on a well constructed traverse out sort of across hemispheres. It's entirely treeless and the snow is stupid deep and thick like a milkshake. You basically point them straight down the hill and wiggle your ass some for effect and to throw snow in your face but otherwise it's entirely effortless joy all the way to lift. This picture is from like 11am, it was 4 or 5 laps after we skied it, I don't know if it's the norm but this place holds snow. Second run I'm on chair 4 by accident some how which is like a bs feader chair but the doodle areas are also deep AF with like two groomer tracks down the middle so you build up speed and then plow into the deep until you run out of speed and back on to the groomers leaving thigh deep trenches. I get it right this time and get up six to hit the "extreme danger area" under the closed C-1 lift. We ran that 3 times in a row working across the face left to right. Face shot after face shot until you hit the flatter portions where you had to tail gun a little it was so thick and deep. In total I bet we did 20 runs essentially across from Pan Face to the Canuck run and it was all lift service cat skiing. Even when it was patching the untracked together there is so much resistance you still go full fall line just bouncing as snow is flying all around you. Now up C5 to the fabled gables a sort of side of the hill shot that is a twisting set of cliffs and little chutes. It was just as deep and just as wild. All over Baker there are cliffs everywhere, the big ones that will kill you are marked. The ones out of the C-1 zone are particularly impressive but it was like Palisades kinda playful and challenging. Jump off this, two slash pow turns around the tree and down the little chute kinda terrain which I live for. I swear to you I've never seen less powder panic. After gables we went up 8 to run a blue bullshit zone called Oh Zone that is directly under the lift and it was still patching untracked sections. The entire day it was lap after lap of pow runs and the whole time everyone is super super chill. This is from around 2pm I swear like maybe two trails over from a lift and it's still skiing untracked. It was a day I'll never forget as long as I live on what are good but certainly not the ski you'd choose skis, at a resort with maybe 2 groomers, that has zero high speed chairs, is not on any pass other than its own and must be bought in person, is 1500 vert and only 5k feet high, has no lodging or development on mtn or really nearby. Essentially Baker is the opposite of everything most of 2022 skiing is about and if you get it on the right day beyond the most fabulous thick pow skiing you see why the Baker Bros are right. That my friends is mad fucking spiritual. If you read nothing else from this report; GO TO MT. BAKER* !!!!! *when it snows

Thank you all for the condolences and helping me give them an honorable send off. @JFskiDanJFskiDan Imagine the surfing turns you could make dragging the inside "tail" at a 45 degree angle in pow @theprogram4theprogram4 In some spots it's so spectacular to look at when the light first hits your eyeballs it's almost like my brain says it's not real. Parts of it are as methy as anywhere else but it's all super green.

I think hirohito said it best now we must suffer the unsufferable. We are holding a service at the bar currently. Corvus, very agro but it was all stuff under the snow so it was play it safe or go for it. It's like 30" on 6" maybe, it's all a field of white so you pick your line but you hit a rock or tree and you have no chance. If I wanted I could ski the groomers only but that's not as fun and alot of the PNW is flat for that kinda snow. It's 100% my choice but until today I've always found the ski if it ran.

I didn't know it would snow, that part was pure luck but the skifari was the plan. The trip idea was to ski the big dogs of the PNW if possible in a single trip. I woke up this morning at 545 no alarm, which for me is about as rare as something can get. From dinner the previous night you could feel the anticipation and electricity in the air. At 730 there was already a gondy line and thankfully I was in it. 3rd gondy and out the door I'm 400mph towards Elk Snort Bowl. With the lifts that are running it will require a 10-15 min walk which should guarantee no tracks from the day before. Patrol was still going up but cool with me going ahead so I reach the top and as far as we can see its 20" with no tracks. I can barely pause long enough to catch my breath the pull is so strong, so let them go and boom white room. It's thick, not as quite as thick as the day before but still hammer down snow. The legit pow bounce is on and its face shots every 2nd or 3rd turn. Short of Silverton/ telluride which is its own unicorn, deepest turns I've had since Rona. As fast as we can possibly go back to the gondy for another lap right back into the deep. From every corner of the hill you can hear people hooting and hollering, noobs, experts, some women in a sit ski they are all getting deeeeep everywhere you can see. Two more laps in there and then on to a different untracked zone some guy told us about on the lift. After the roll over shit was like every snow enthusiasts dream, effortless super deep. The gentlemen did not tell us of the walk out which in waist deep snow was sweaty and matters to the rest of the day. My thought was to go for an easier cool down lap in bear pits which was full of sharks but very good the day before. First 3 or 4 turns are fucking tits but a group of goobers are jerking off in the gully I want so I move over one and instantaneously the right ski is off. I sort of hockey stop but Fuuuuck the ski didn't stop, brakes are deployed but now it's really picking up speed. I track it all the way to where it stops 10 miles down the hill but by the time I can get there on one ski its been buried/moved. Friends show up shortly there after and we do essentially a body search but she dead. For me that's like loosing your dog, it has a mind of its own but that's on you and to make matters worse now I have to ski out of there on one ski in 20" of fresh. No fucking doubts but needless to say by the time I reached the lodge I needed a soda and 5. Short of teaching someone I've never done more work to get down the hill. Once my ski-less boot caught in the pow and I did two dude style whirly birds before absolutely eating shit which was very fun to watch I've been told. I got rentals and after lunch got some very good laps but my zen was off. I'm headed to Baker tomorrow and now I have to rent skis like a fucking Jerry but it will be dope and I'll forget about the skis. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ode to my skis In 40 years I have never left a good ski behind. You should know that we did not abandon you in Bear Pits lightly and in the event that you are found, SP has my info. You served valiantly and fought with great valor and courage. We slayed much together. I simultaneously took the best and no care of you in the eternal struggle to slay the sickest deepest lines and I shall miss you dearly until powder7 delivers a new pair to my door next week.

Copper sounds perfect and the top is flat so green blue skiers can go up there too. Don't miss the kids Cowboy village, you can ski through all the little houses

Love me some Reading Rainbow, fuck sesame street I can fly anywhere, places to go, people to know...Reading Rainbow 🌈 🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈 Still snowing and I'm out to go get in the line up

I feel like once every 10 years it's ok I was maybe 20th in line at the gondy but it stopped for awhile and peeps peaced out for Chinook so I ended up in the 3rd cabin. From the moment the doors opened and the wind tried to blow you to Kansas it was on. It's full Geordi LaForge out, I'm not sure where I'm going and its half snow half some kind of pellet that gets into the cuff of your glove but fuck it power down to lucky shot traverse and go right to Bear Pits. The only other guy going out slips off the side as everything is white and he's gone. Full speed blind traversing through 10" of thick fluff with mixed pockets of wind scour but the gate is found and we power on. Bear Pits I recall being chutey and cliffy but I can't see any of it and besides my group there isn't a soul or track in sight. I spot a middle wide sort of chute into an apron and hammer down, first turn I almost go straight over the handlebars as I'm guessing on density, second turn is wind scour and now I'm off balance and going way too fucking fast but I can see the fat snow line now and can cork up the turn where you put it all back together and it's deeeep thick fluff. Attacking snow, where you set the giver lever to 120%. Speed control is irrelevant, it's 20% water so absolute full speed hero snow where huge airs and wrecks are a poof and back at it. I ended up semi lost at some random lift which happened to be Forrest Queen which after another untouched mid angle lap led us to Chair 6. From roughly 940 to 1220 we did nothing but non stop chair 6 laps. Each time going a bit further out the traverse and each time it was the best non-blue turns I've made all season. Good thick were you can go absolutely all out of untracked lap after lap........ but at a price. First lap I hit what looks to be a lip to air but is a tree branch covered in snow and that ski goes weeeeeeeee. Second lap I find the best line of the season where between two trees over what had to be straight boiler plate I get a legit face shot. Further down that run .3 milliseconds after popping off a roller the left ski catches something and I double eject. This was the pattern all morning, incredible turns but some snakes with the low base. 1 was on me but 5 times and twice in a run a ski went weeeeeeeee and I had to go get it out of some kind of bramble or brush. Absolutely 10000000% one of the funest pow days ever even if its far lower on the quality scale. Everyone is staying on Campus to get the goods here tomorrow as its supposed to snow 6-8 tonight and then be nicer. Too many words but everytime you took the phone out the lens would get covered with snow.

Fucking stupid sick day, I rode non stop pow until my hands are shaking like Michael J. Fox. Recharging with lunch but endless nobody home lines. Super thick and variable. I've taken 6 falls so far which is like 2 seasons worth but only one was on me. Full on donkey Kong charging snow and my God is it good to jump off. I wish I could say this is some stupid secret line but the lift is 2000ft away, no one is here.

I got to Tacoma around 830 and ate the dopest sushi at Sushi Ari. The Salmon in a box was one of the most unique and tasty rolls I've ever had. Baker was too far, the pass would be a nightmare and alpental is closed. So Xtal it is. I left around six to steady rain and high winds, drive was uneventful as the plan was Xtal as the road is flat for a ski area. It looks like a weird kinda weather day but should be some fluff around as the lot is using almost all of the tacos ground clearance.

I was just a little behind, I'm trying to get to Tacoma or Glacier maybe before it's late late. Be it dating or skiing i appreciate a fine view and with that in mind I left Bend around 6 to hoof it up to Hood Meadows. Common to the west right about where the land goes from green to brown you find a rez and shortly their after a casino and mad rv peeps do 23 all the way to govt camp who for some reason need to gamble there at all hours of the day. Sun was shining in the lot but up high the peak danced in and out of sight through dark foreboding clouds. The way the snow was being blown over the Ridge and swirled across the upper face made the smart peeps grab their mittens and the upper lift never opened which was likely a blessing. 30mph winds 2/3 the way up steady from the bell to when I left at 3. Cold AF in the wind and grey. That's not to say it was a bad day, coming across the top of the far left groomer you are treated to a sublime view of hood and the glacial morain it's fury gauged out of the earth. The run is two football fields wide and medium pitch, not another soul was on it, snow was nice soft leftover bake from the previous days sun with an Ansel Adam's back drop. You put the hammer down to 110 and do whatever the fuck you want. Ludicrous speed full trail width arcs to floaty air rollers with minimal speed control. The runs where for a second at least your a golden fucking god to feel so alive, to be so lucky to experience that, lucky to be a skier. I ate the most dope fish for lunch and explored some more runs while the weather progressively got more crab fishing and less skiing. Driving graupel bullshit and only a dozen or so soft groomers and I peaced out around 3. If I can get back to Tacoma in time I'm going to eat my weight in Sushi before deciding what the fuck to do about tomorrow. Big dumps in the forecast but super high winds will likely shut down the game pretty much everywhere. Baker is the super gamblers choice for Monday but Tacoma puts alot near by.

There is something super cool about the prominence of the volcanos and driving up it feels very large. Not in a telluride way where it's like the alps, I'm not sure any other place can be judged by that metric but it is super pretty in its own way. The summit terrain is legit but the rest is just fun groomers. Everyone is hyper nice and not in a Mormon way. I'm in bend right now at the campfire hotel, I'm riding with some friends in the area but today was solo as I was the only one who wanted to make the trek to Oregon Baker is on my list too, 60% of why I went PNW was because of talking to Charles who went early in the year and you and I were talking about baker and bachelor at some point in the lot.

Bachelor is soooooo dope, like Highlands or Palisades, for me it's exactly what I want in a ski area. From the moment you are about 15 miles out it looms large in the distance and as you get closer and closer you can't believe they ran a lift to the top. I was expecting firm cord at opening so I started an Sunnyside which gets first light. Surprisingly there was some light chalk around and first run it was nice cord. I ran groomers off cloudchaser and pine marten until noon with zero lines and jump off everything super soft. Super playful constant action kinda terrain where you can work in endless airs. After lunch the summit lift was turning and a 15 min walk later and I was standing up top to harvest some corn. The wind had blown the top arm to rotten terrible sastrugi so I zipped around to hit the morain face I had scoped from the lift. I was mostly trying to get to the gully to farm corn but why not get there via a more spicy route. The cut in on the cornice was over medium shark fin but one tech turn and it was an apron to milk turns. I was for a second in my head thinking this is a super bad idea so I was stoked it worked out. Looking up you can see its more chalky snow and I thought I had fucked up on the corn A tech entry means low traffic and staying up on the Ridge I wondered into perfect super baked up corn untouched. It was pure Nebraska corn harvest and I milked the fuck out of those turns all the way to the lift. The rest of the day I ran groomers under the skyliner lift which is busted. It was super nice zero traffic groomers though the slog out sucks hairy ballsack when it's 65 degrees down low. Now I'm eating pizza hut breadsticks from an actual pizza hut restaurant. Super super dope spring day, peeps are so nice with zero pretentiousness and almost no Jerry's. I could spend a lifetime their and be super super happy but there is a potential for 30+" at baker Monday/ Tuesday so I may start making my way up there and hit meadows on the way tomorrow. Seriously though for a 1000 reasons Bachelor is le tits, it's a volcano you can ski all the way around, the terrain is endless.

Holy shit are there alot of pine trees, its like if western CO fucked a rainforest and the baby they had is Washington state. Alot of the grass here is fluorescent green, you just can't believe how fucking green everything is. I forgot how impressive Mt. Hood is, short of Maroon Bells or San Juan's it's one of the best to look at. They all Midwest drive, 5 over max but $32 llr gram carts and who cares. Off to Bachelor, spring skiing but should be good.

I think the lines will be just as long if not longer, it's blue and they could have a lift for each run and it would be crowded

Switch is the best, TCS non ditch us doodle doodle doodle omg pitch and your done. It's a leitner poma so they are spending some loot, I for one can't wait for the heated Italian leather seats and ski up espresso bar.

Pnw with Jlaw ?

I like that we have spies, like the groomer accidentally puts the carpet down and it's on here in minutes. I soooo hope they pull a quick one and open this weekend

I'm still in the let's be dramatic about the end of ski season mode but it's been cold this week

Closing day is always a pour one out for your homie kinda deal but good lord it was one of the best seasons. It was an honor and an pleasure skiing and chilling with all of you. Best lot anywhere. Blue I thought did a super good job....winter should be six months long. Huge props to Benm on 2x4 skis and Indiggio for braving the cold at line up, vintage is coooooold

Vibes to Dirt and BenM, heal up quick +++++++ I'll be there both days with bells on

It was tough skiing, hard uneven snow and big brown outs that keep switching sides. It must be tough to groom as they had left big strips of debris. Switch is probably the worst out there. Upper main was 60% riding the bull, lower was good especially the left side in the sun. Best I thought was side but overall it was just super nice to be out and I wouldn't have missed it if it was all dirt. Once the fog lifted it was mad nice out and coverage is much better than I thought it would be earlier this week. Bump dudes have all of TCS but you know they'll be setting all weekend on razors or something too 🤣🤣

Rode with Atomic from 1 to 3, snow was legit hero spring snow. Super super soft jump off everything snow. Sun was shining hard but with the breeze it was perfect. Crowds were non existent and razors was still nicely smooth, we did that mostly as it was full speed effortless arcs, full grip and where you can go 75% pop off the lips. Challenge, TCS, side where all very very good but razors might be the best spring snow I've had all year. I would wager we are in for a spicy weekend, the perennial thin spots went fast and Challenge, side, NMDW, all are close to a fast grass section as the other angle/flat spots are thin and 10ft wide.

Fuuuuck today was soooo good, we had two kinds of experimental skis !!! As always Enjo brought straight fire, its the best food served in a parking lot anywhere bar none. My house is going to smell like farts all night which is a very high compliment. Massive props to JfDan and Benm on the custom boards, I loooooove that kind of thing and the all tips skied way better than I thought. We are getting the 84 lumber pro models on the hill. The snow was not good but irrelevant, on jorts alone we had so much fun and laughs. I'm sure Boo disagrees but it's almost scary how smokey and the bandit mute looks channeling his inner Burt Reynolds. Shit was soooo good I'm going to sleep, the highest jlaw form of flattery.

Midweek would be the tits Mcgee I'm not ready to work a regular day

Children's motrin will very rarely make a kids skin fall off, like alot of it. All drugs are interesting, like swallow one and it makes your penis hard, another and you can see the matrix and dance all night. Plus some stuff just has seemingly random side effects, advil is rough on your gut because the same receptor it blocks for pain also tells your stomach to make a new lining. THC rando blocks the one that says your full hence the munchies. Shit is random and weird, Tylenol they don't actually know why it blocks pain. There are like 5 theories but one involves the endocabinoid system so it may be like a cousin of the best drug of all time.