Camelback Trip Report 1/5/2025

[saltyant]

Today was a legendary day at Camelback, the greatest ski resort in northeastern Pennsylvania, maybe even the best in eastern Pennsylvania. I am still recovering from the amazing awesomeness experienced at this local hill station. In da house were myself and many other radical fans of the famous camel mascot. I arrived at 800 sharp under cloudy skys and immediately met a boomer in guest services who was passionately expressing his distaste over Camelback staff due to confusion over his ski locker debacle situation. Due to many complications involving a ski locker, he said, and I quote, "I am never skiing Camelback again". I could not believe these words as Camelback is totally radical.

After receiving my "Peak-2-Peak Pass" (TM) which is basically my Blue Mountain pass blessed with Camelback access, I drove my Subaru to the gaper land parking lot where they were blowing lots and lots of perder. I witnessed some dude with RTMs, and they appeared to be 170 length. That was sick. Next I booted up and sipped some coffee and craved some Yoo Hoo. Then I walked to the gaper lift which was running again after a brief shut down. it must have been tired from it being early on Sunday morning. Exhilarated to ride this lift, I walked past the frozen ice pond which was formerly 8 inches of standing cold water according to some super fan of Camelback on the face books. I was distraught that I didn't get to wade through 8 inches of water and then get to experience drying my socks off at the blow dryer in the restaurant while high fiving a real life camel.

Next I rode the gaper lift and had the time of my life. There was some perder blowing but it was only slightly in my face, unlike Blue Mountain the True Mountain where they actively blow cold Perder at your face on 66.6666% of high speed lifts. That was rad. Thankfully I wore my Face Mask (tm) so the Perder only stung a little. Next I skied down a massive slope, like 10 feet of actual vertical drop, to transfer to the Big Black Bear Six high speed lift. It was a glorious ride to the top of the mountain, probably up to 1700 feet or maybe even 1700.1 feet of elevation gain. I peered into the vast horizon to the north where I would be able to gaze upon the majestic Catskills of New York state, but sadly the snow cloud from all the Perder being blown on Nile Mile for two or maybe now three weeks had accumulated into a massive snow cloud that obstructed my view.

Nonetheless, the first ride down the Camelback mountain was radical. I skied past the grassy slopes of Marjorie's Delight, The Rocket, Big Pocono, and Uncle Bill's Way, and noted the greenness of the grass which gave me the urge to frolic in those meadowlands, with nary a snow gun in sight. Skiing on grass is totally radical. I skied down Upper Cleopatra and into Honeymoon and that was a life changing experience. I was high from the exhilaration ski experience down the slope and craved to split a hot cocoa and maybe a quarter piece of sugar cookie with Ski2Live, but he was nowhere to be seen as he was probably still mentally recovering from that amazing day when I lapped Honeymoon 49 times and recorded the experience with my GoPro camera, and then high fived a Camel and split a hot cocoa with Ski2Live. That was rad.

The runs down King Tuts, ASP, and Humpty Dumpty were out of this world. So much fun, so much pitch and so much Perder. Lots and lots of snow coverage to guide my ski edges down as they were pulled by the intense force of gravity while riding the snow flake molecules which covered the luscious leas of the steep, steep pitched mountainside. Tears of joy flowed from my eyes as I sped probably around 170 km per hours according to my official Jitterbug speed reader calculation device, and whizzed past the knolls of the barren slopes nearby. The flat run out after the steep slopes gave my body a well deserved rest after skiing with intensity down the expert Black Diamond slope of Asp and the Super Expert Double Black Diamond The Hump ski hill slope, which should probably be a Quadruple Black Diamond. Fellow passionate Camelback fans hooted and hollered and cheered at the current status of the mountain, with a mind blowing 15 trails open I think I counted. Afterwards I made my way to the parking lot to recover and drank some cold coffee and a stale sugar cookie that a smuggled in past security. JADIP WTGAI CamelbackRulez.

Edited Sunday at 10:03 PM by saltyant

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

Im Gonna have to vape up for this one.  

[Shadows]

are we graduating to vaping up and having sex? VUHS?

[saltyant]

1 hour ago, GrilledSteezeSandwich said:

Im Gonna have to vape up for this one.  

Can you rate this thread 5 stars? I can't believe the rating is down to an abysmal 2 stars for such a stellar Trip Report. What a bunch of jealous haters.

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

1 hour ago, Shadows said:

are we graduating to vaping up and having sex? VUHS?

Shadows welcome back.  How was your trip to the Deep South???

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

11 minutes ago, saltyant said:

Can you rate this thread 5 stars? I can't believe the rating is down to an abysmal 2 stars for such a stellar Trip Report. What a bunch of jealous haters.

I rated it five stars to bring up the average. One of these days when one of my jackalope customers gives me a bad review on the googles(fingers crossed it hasn’t happened yet) I’ll have you and your brahs and your hot sister write positive reviews on the googles.  

[Shadows]

14 minutes ago, GrilledSteezeSandwich said:

Shadows welcome back.  How was your trip to the Deep South???

still here. this stroke fucked me up dude. i think i live here now?

[saltyant]

8 minutes ago, GrilledSteezeSandwich said:

I rated it five stars to bring up the average. One of these days when one of my jackalope customers gives me a bad review on the googles(fingers crossed it hasn’t happened yet) I’ll have you and your brahs and your hot sister write positive reviews on the googles.  

Thanks for your five stars rating and support to counter all these haters. Yes yes, we shall enlist Rajeev as well to post reviews on the googles and also the face books

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

22 minutes ago, Shadows said:

still here. this stroke fucked me up dude. i think i live here now?

Have you been enjoying the food and the ladies?  

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

23 minutes ago, saltyant said:

Thanks for your five stars rating and support to counter all these haters. Yes yes, we shall enlist Rajeev as well to post reviews on the googles and also the face books

You’re welcome and anytime and I enjoyed the report.  

[saltyant]

56 minutes ago, GrilledSteezeSandwich said:

You’re welcome and anytime and I enjoyed the report.  

Thanks. You're welcome and anytime. This report will go down in the top 500 Camelback trip reports of 2025, maybe even the top 499.

[Shadows]

8 hours ago, GrilledSteezeSandwich said:

Have you been enjoying the food and the ladies?  

oh yea. i VUHS all the time.

[Shadows]

whoever tagged me 'rtms' lol.

i totally forgot about that shit.

[PSUFrankenstein]

$40 all day tickets to Camelwhack - https://beasleyphilly.incentrev.com/wmmr/deals - seems like a great deal to ski the incredible conditions highlighted in Salty's report

[RidgeRacer]

9 minutes ago, PSUFrankenstein said:

$40 all day tickets to Camelwhack - https://beasleyphilly.incentrev.com/wmmr/deals - seems like a great deal to ski the incredible conditions highlighted in Salty's report

Drop the 4 and I'd consider it, but only if blue was closed 

[theprogram4]

Me waiting on the Amtrak TR

 

[GrilledSteezeSandwich]

5 minutes ago, theprogram4 said:

Me waiting on the Amtrak TR

 

Shadows book has been released. 
 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DS8Z2YZ9

[EdBacon]

Do they still sell pierogi in the lodge?